Mattie makes me really happy. Even when things aren't great, they are better than I ever hoped for.

That is all.

I am over this week already. That is all.

I gotta find me a place to live.

That is how I feel. I need to vomit more but I just can't.

I think the fact I am not sleeping hardly at all at the moment, is a much bigger factor in my current moods than I first thought. I can't sleep right now. I feel exhausted. I am agitated. It's now that I start to dwell...Sadly there is only 1 thing that has a proven success rate at helping me sleep and well he is too far away. The more tired I am I think the worse I am when I slip into these moods I've been having.

Cause I don't want the world to see me, cause I don't think that they'd understand.

I can't face up to people right now.

I'm not in a bad mood, I just feel anti-social.

And Josh broke up, she is moving home tomorrow. I am not excited.

I felt sick but it was fun they kind of played a shitty set list but the fact that I am seeing Streetlight & RBF next week makes everything seem far better in perspective.
So I haven't been sleeping well, and tonight after bouncing souls I drove Dave home, and I went through a red light without even noticing until Dave pointed it out. Think I am tired much?

In other news I love Mattie too much and it makes me really happy.

I totally had something like good or important to write here, but I am too tired to remember what it was.

I am mood swing. I don't have them. I am one. It's offical. I should be asleep cause my eyes burn from tired. I will be soon. Tonight made me miss Mattie a lot more than usual...when we were talking about things well it's just hard. The distance is hard. But I love him and I can wait until we can be together. I can. I could and I can and I will

I love Mattie. I miss him. He helps me more than anyone else ever could. I don't know what I would do if he wasn't there.